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A Wheel of Time Wiki

The term pillow-friends refers to a homosexual relationship between two individuals (usually female ones, making it a lesbian relationship). It is most prevalent in the White Tower.

Novices and Accepted commonly enjoy these relationships as comfort during the hardships of White Tower training, but are viewed as a thing of girlhood[1] and are almost universally abandoned upon gaining the shawl. Some attempt to continue the relationships even as Aes Sedai though.

This has the equivalent term of heart-friends in Seanchan slang.[2][3]

Known pillow-friends

Suspected pillow-friends

First-sisters and/or sister-wives (or equivalent) ambiguous relationships:


Gay men

Author's clarification

"Well, you put fifteen-year-old girls in a tower filled with almost entirely women, with their hormones raging on overdrive, keep them away from men, because you can’t afford to lose any of them, and what do you think is going to happen?"
Marcon 36 convention in May 2001
"Pillow friends are not just good friends. Oh, they are that, too, but they also get hot and sweaty together and muss up the sheets something fierce. By the way, pillow friends is a term used in the White Tower. The same relationship between men or women elsewhere would be called something else, depending on the country."
Robert Jordan's Blog on September 30, 2005
"For the most part, in this world such things are taken as a matter of course. Remember, Cadsuane is surprised that Shalon and Ailil were so hot to hide that they had been sharing a bed even knowing how prim and proper Cairhienin are on the surface. Well, for many it is just on the surface."
The Official Robert Jordan Blog on October 6, 2005

In the television series

The television series portrays several characters as LGBT+ which are not confirmed for the book series.

See also

External links


  1. 1.0 1.1 1.2 Knife of Dreams, Chapter 25
  2. Winter's Heart, Chapter 20
  3. Bethamin ... wrote a suggestion that Zushi be moved from the Palace to somewhere she could be kept in a double kennel with a damane from the Empire, preferably one experienced in becoming heart-friends with newly collared damane. Sooner or later, that always put an end to tears.
  4. New Spring, Chapter 17
  5. Winter's Heart, Chapter 13
  6. Meidani... scurried from the room breathing hard, her eyes wide... Elaida laughed. "We were pillow-friends as novices," she said."
  7. Pillow-friends were common among novices and Accepted, but girlhood things should be left behind with girlhood. Not all sisters saw it so, certainly. Galina had been quite surprised when Tarna refused her advances after gaining the shawl.
  8. The Path of Daggers, Chapter 26
  9. She smiled at Seaine and Pevara, a monarch perhaps unsure how gracious she should be. "I saw the pair of you sniffing about like ferrets at the hencoop," she said, "but I held my tongue - you might be pillow-friends, for all I know, and whose business is that but yours?"
  10. A Crown of Swords, Chapter 40
  11. Galina wanted to laugh. Maidens; they called these monstrous women Maidens. She wished she could laugh. At least there were no men present, a small mercy. Men made her skin crawl, and if one could see her now, less than half-clothed... Anxiously, her eyes sought for Therava... "She is mine, Sevanna." Therava’s jaw tightened. She might have taken the woman [Galina], but da'tsang belonged to no one. "I intended to dress her in gai'shain robes of silk," she muttered.
  12. The Path of Daggers, Chapter 11
  13. Plucking the rod from Galina's limp hands, Therava tucked it behind her belt as she straightened. "It also seems that you will wear white after all, Galina Casban." For some reason, she gave a pleased smile at that.
  14. Crossroads of Twilight, Chapter 9
  15. Galina was pretty, but nowhere near beautiful, and Faile did not understand what Therava saw in her, unless it was simply the pleasure of dominating an Aes Sedai. "The last time Therava thought you'd poked your nose where she didn't want it, everybody inside a hundred paces could hear you squealing and begging."
  16. Knife of Dreams, Chapter 24
  17. Knife of Dreams, Chapter 5
  18. Knife of Dreams, Chapter 3
  19. ... something more than an alliance might come of it. She had always fancied Graendal. She no longer really remembered having been a man.
  20. The Shadow Rising, Chapter 49
  21. Amys and Lian, lying on either side of Rhuarc and smiling at each other almost as much as at their husband.
  22. The Fires of Heaven, Glossary
  23. The Fires of Heaven, Chapter 21
  24. He was a little surprised to see Melaine directing the white-robed figures. Only three nights before, she had married Bael, in a ceremony that made her his wife and first-sister to his other wife, Dorindha. That part had been just as important as the marriage, apparently.
  25. Crossroads of Twilight, Chapter 10
  26. ... she loved Aviendha every bit as much as she did Rand, only in a different way...
  27. The Path of Daggers, Chapter 9
  28. Sulin says "Teryl Wynter and Furen Alharra are close to Seonid Traighan — like first-brothers with a first-sister; she does not like men as men — yet they offered to take her punishment for her.